OK, since I am writing my Sunday blog on Tuesday, I thought I’d use this as a topic.  When you commit to something, then you don’t follow through, how do you respond?  Now, of course, the goal is to plan sufficiently well so as to not have this happen.  But, let’s face it, as humans we don’t always do that.  I was traveling on Sunday and blog completely slipped my mind.  I did not plan ahead at all.  So once “what’s done is done,” how you respond can impact how you are being today and into the future.  I’ll use the example of my Sunday blog post, but the response could translate to anything you may have not followed through on.

Level 1 (Victim/ Apathy) – I would beat myself for having not done it, dragging out the emotional problem.  I would also have an “oh, poor me, there is so much to do” sort of attitude, paying no attention to the fact that I am the one who created the Sunday blog post, and am I the one who booked my travel to Vegas, and ultimately I am responsible.

Level 2 (Anger/ Conflict) – Here I might be angry at myself for forgetting the blog, or angry at the people I spent time with in Vegas when I could have been writing. (I would never do that, ladies!)  I would also be stressed and judging myself, because what if someone sees that I didn’t do what I said and somehow that hurts me.  There is lots of “blog competition” out there – what if someone stops reading my blog?  I’d be in fear of the consequences.

Level 3 (Responsibility/ Forgiveness) – At this level I would take responsibility for the fact that I didn’t manage my time better, and let it go.  I would still feel anxious about it, and probably have some worry or wonder if others would be judging me, but I would not spend a lot of time ruminating on it.  I would forgive myself, but I wouldn’t forget.  I’d be still carrying a tally because I was on vacation on Sunday couple weeks back.

Level 4 (Concern/ Compassion) – At this level I would not worry about people’s judgment of me for what I didn’t do, but I may be concerned that people were counting on me, and I would wonder if I had a negative impact on them by not following through.  I may try to make up for my lack somehow (by writing on Tuesday?? :))

Level 5 (Reconciliation/ Peace) – At level 5 I simply won’t focus on what is wrong in a situation because I am not judging right and wrong, therefore I will focus on the opportunity.  Perhaps whatever I would have written on Sunday would not be the same as this, and this “mistake-inspired” topic may be perfect for someone where they are right now (my perfectionists tend to beat themselves up a lot).  There is the opportunity for me, yet again, to accept not being perfect (note, I am not emotionally burdened by this “mistake”).  There is also an opportunity for me to notice what works for me and make improvements.  (I added “write blog” to calendar, rather than keeping it in my head.  When I am traveling, I will post in advance about my travel and determine whether to take the week off).

Level 6 (Sythesis/ Joy) – Here I am simply joyful about what I have done, and I am not worried about whether or not I wrote this week.  I wouldn’t be concerned about whether I missed the chance to “help” you by writing this, because I know you are perfect just the way you are, and everything is actually fine.  I’d check in with my intuition about whether to write it late, and whether I did or I didn’t (I did!), there would be no self judgment about that whatsoever.  I would do it late simply for the inspiration of it.

Level 7 (Non-Judgement/ Passion) – I have not given the whole thing another thought.  Time is irrelevant, and nothing really happened on the quantum level.

From what level do you tend to respond when you “mess up”?  Ho would you like to respond.  For me, I apologize for not planning better(Level 3), I truly hope I haven’t inconvenienced you in any way (Level 4), and I trust that my missing Sunday has somehow served to empower you in some way, as it has me (Level 5).  I have enjoyed sharing my thoughts with you and I know it was in the highest good for me to go ahead and write today (Level 6).  Have a joyful week!

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