I received an email forward from my friend, Barb Appelbaum (liveinwellnessnow.com), which contained some inspiring and some heart-wrenching images and captions, as well as the following quote:
“Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some sort of battle.”
First, this is really a key tenet of life in the Sweet Spot. Everyone is dealing with something. The greater their awareness, the less entrenched in it they are, but everyone is dealing with something on the inside. When you are present to this, you stop taking everything personally so you can get in another person’s world. You look for what is right about them and choose to focus on that. You interact with others from a place of awareness that we are each broken in our own way, and we are (with consciously shifting this) responding to life from the hurts of the past.
One of the images was a picture of a dog sitting in the rain alone with the caption, “I waited for you.” So first, if you don’t know this about me yet, I am a “dog person,” so that tugs on my heart strings. But it also hit me deeper and reminded me that, while we heal our hurts when step into the “Sweet Spot,” the past tendencies can linger.
You see, growing up, I was often that dog. I sat on the front porch waiting for my dad to pick me up, as he said he would. More often than not, he didn’t come. My stepfather told me how it broke his heart every time he had to pick me up and carry me inside because I’d fallen asleep on the porch, waiting. Now, I’ve done the inner work with this. I’ve forgiven my dad and formed a fresh, adult relationship with him, and accepted that he was fighting his own battle at the time. I have noticed my tendency to not wait for anybody, and my tendency to avoid being disappointed like that. I have created new possibilities to take their place, and in doing so I became open to following my own dreams. (One doesn’t believe in dreams when they subconsciously assume they’ll be disappointed, and don’t really trust people!)
Without recognizing the old hurts that created my defensive belief systems (don’t expect much so you won’t be disappointed, etc.), I’d be no where near my “Sweet Spot” today. And still, I have a little tinge in my gut at the image of the dog waiting on the doorstep in the rain. Wherever you are on your personal journey, take a moment to become aware at a deeper level of your own internal battles that you are choosing to bring into conversation with others.
Have compassion for yourself – be kinder than necessary.
THEN, share that compassion with the people around you. Don’t worry about figuring them out or labeling their internal battles, just know that whatever they are doing that might annoy you, they are doing for their own perfectly logical reasons. They will resolve their internal battle in their own time. For today, let go of your judgment and wish them a kind and gentle day.