HourglassWe’ve got an epidemic on our hands. It’s the waiting game, and it’s running rampant among us.

This week alone I’ve surrounded by people’s really damn good reasons for waiting. But here’s the thing. Every thought and action has an energetic consequence. When we wait in one area, whether we have a really good reason or not, we are telling the Universe we are willing to wait in other areas.

The waiting game always has a root cause – things like fear of being wrong, being pushy, being demanding or bitchy, fear of success, fear of failure, or a desire to manipulate an outcome with our action or lack thereof. (If I call them now, they might now buy later, etc.)

This epidemic is exhausting. Every person I talked to this week who told me they were tired was able to isolate the exhaustion to the energy lost in waiting on someone or something.

Remember our old friend Circumstance Cindy? Waiting for stuff to happen is depleting, and sometimes it’s downright self-abuse.

So we aren’t going analyze the cause today – let’s look at how to make it stop. I’ve captured the action to take to combat the 5 main places I’ve seen people stuck in waiting.

1. Put Your Paycheck on Autopay

Oh my goodness, I’ve done it too. You wait to see how much money you have left at the end of the month and pay yourself what’s left. The problem is that you are letting the Universe know that your needs are negotiable, and you are willing to wait. “Once I get to… then I’ll pay myself.”

Now, I didn’t pay myself early in my business. I was willing to re-invest everything and I would do that over again because my business needed it to grow. What I would do differently is set a firm goal by when paying myself was non-negotiable. When I got to this point I put my paycheck on autopay. I was essentially declaring that money WOULD be there. It changed everything.

2. Call, Don’t Email

When we send requests or inquiries via email, we’re essentially building in 1-2 extra days for whatever outcome we are looking for. And, Truth? The other person may not, and doesn’t have to, respond at all!

It can be challenging if you are working long hours and want to get some extra stuff done in the evening via email. But if you notice yourself playing the waiting game, carve out some focused time and hop on the phone to get the answers you need. The sense of urgency and intention that comes with a phone call in today’s world of email will create results.

3. Fire, Quit, or Get Fired

If it’s not happening, let it go. It may sound harsh, but sometimes we have to stir things up. You’re not a bad person. If it’s not working for you, there is a reason. Let it go. Stop analyzing what you could do differently to make it work. Sure, sometimes we sabotage, and sometimes our unhealthy expectations create issues and we have a hard time discerning it. So what? If you’re in a relationship that’s not working – whether it’s with a client, a team member, a vendor, or a coach, if it’s not working let it go.

This assumes you’ve already had direct conversations about what you want and need. If you have, if you’ve come to the table fully present and real, and the situation has not shifted, you’ve got to move on. Sure, you may find out that you missed something and could have done it differently. But if you can’t see what to do differently RIGHT NOW, you’re simply playing the waiting game.

You might worry that people will judge you and think you are rude or bitchy. They might. You’ll live. You’ll be afraid of the consequence of the closed door. Do it anyway. The new door that opens will create a whole new adventure.

4. Stop Manipulating

One of my favorite quotes is by Vernon Howard. He said “Never suppress yourself in an effort to influence, hold, or win someone. When we are unreal, so are our rewards.”

Often the reason people wait is, at the core, a manipulation technique. They keep their mouth shut and don’t do what they know they need to do because they are afraid that if they do it will negatively impact someone else’s actions or perceptions. Often, they are worried someone – a client, a spouse, a team member – will leave.

Some people will leave. Some people will judge. It’s better than sitting around waiting for them to get comfortable with where you’re going. And, the Truth is, you can’t ever really predict how others will respond. So you might as well take some action and find out!

5. Spend Some Time and Money

One of the biggest things we wait for is to make decisions to invest in the things we know we need or want because we think eventually we’ll just have the extra money sitting around, or an abundance of time to have fun.

For some people, they just need to spend on ANYTHING in order to shift out of the waiting. Buy some new shoes, spend a day in the garden, take someone out to dinner. For most people, they know the things on their list that they are waiting to move on out of fear. Just do it. Often, many small businesses have programs on they would be willing to give you flexible payment plans if you are willing to make an initial deposit. It pays to inquire about options as once you commit with a deposit it moves you from waiting into action.

6. Be supremely willing to be wrong, but act as if you know you are right

Often we wait for confirmation of the rightness of our position, point of view, or plan of action. We want to meditate for clarity. We wait to see if people are going to finally change before we make a decision to change because we’re terrified to be wrong.

Here’s the deal with this. The actual result, or whether you are right or wrong, is of minimal importance as compared to your experience of life in the moment. When you are worried about being wrong and steeped in doubt, it permeates everything. And all we have in life, really, is our experience in the moment. There’s no guarantee about what might happen next, so you might as well make decisions and make yourself right about them. Because it feels so much better to feel right, even if you’re completely missing the boat. Right? 🙂


Share This